While my last post stated I really have nothing to complain about pregnancy-wise, I was wrong. I will continue to post about my out-of-control chest region.
Last weekend was an exercise in futility as I tried to find a swimsuit to wear on my upcoming vacation. Buying a swimsuit when you're not pregnant is less than enjoyable. Buying one while pregnant ranks just above a root canal.
While trying on various options at Destination Maternity, I could not stop laughing. The sales girl popped over to ask if I needed help. My question was do you have any suit available that when I put it on will not scare small children? Her answer? "We don't carry anything with under wire support."
Yeah, thanks. You could have pointed that out sooner and saved me lots of time and discouragement. Mission failed.
Then last night Husband tells me about a discussion he had with the lifeguard at the Y. She commented that she doesn't often see swimmers with breasts as big as mine. He agreed. I asked him if this is a topic of conversation that he's having more frequently. His answer? "Pretty much with everyone. Especially all the employees that I know at the Y." Horrifying.
Today was the high point of the breast debacle. It was the kick-off meeting of my new work project with all the bigwigs - chancellor, vice chancellors, campus presidents. You get the gist. As I cover my part of the agenda, I'm telling the committee chairs that I'll send them a list of best practice institutions. Except I said breast practice institutions. My boss about spit coffee across the table.
After a small pause I say, "I'm pregnant. Now seems like a really good time to play that card." The female campus presidents cannot stop laughing. I then promise to send every one a list of both best practice and breast practice institutions after the meeting.
Afterwords, my boss mentions the best part was watching everyone try to avoid looking at my chest. I have a whole new respect for well-endowed women. Bras off to you.
Last weekend was an exercise in futility as I tried to find a swimsuit to wear on my upcoming vacation. Buying a swimsuit when you're not pregnant is less than enjoyable. Buying one while pregnant ranks just above a root canal.
While trying on various options at Destination Maternity, I could not stop laughing. The sales girl popped over to ask if I needed help. My question was do you have any suit available that when I put it on will not scare small children? Her answer? "We don't carry anything with under wire support."
Yeah, thanks. You could have pointed that out sooner and saved me lots of time and discouragement. Mission failed.
Then last night Husband tells me about a discussion he had with the lifeguard at the Y. She commented that she doesn't often see swimmers with breasts as big as mine. He agreed. I asked him if this is a topic of conversation that he's having more frequently. His answer? "Pretty much with everyone. Especially all the employees that I know at the Y." Horrifying.
Today was the high point of the breast debacle. It was the kick-off meeting of my new work project with all the bigwigs - chancellor, vice chancellors, campus presidents. You get the gist. As I cover my part of the agenda, I'm telling the committee chairs that I'll send them a list of best practice institutions. Except I said breast practice institutions. My boss about spit coffee across the table.
After a small pause I say, "I'm pregnant. Now seems like a really good time to play that card." The female campus presidents cannot stop laughing. I then promise to send every one a list of both best practice and breast practice institutions after the meeting.
Afterwords, my boss mentions the best part was watching everyone try to avoid looking at my chest. I have a whole new respect for well-endowed women. Bras off to you.
Comments
Post a Comment